


Sometimes Lifes Pretty Boring and Cheesy

by Bumble_Rumble



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: ??? - Freeform, F/F, Fluff, Group chat, M/M, Texting, healthy!sibling!bonding!, jared and his side hoes, named after a bill wurtz song, really dumb???, references to shark tale, references to shrek, the murphy siblings have killed once and will kill again, zoe and alana being perfect as usual
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-03-04
Packaged: 2019-03-26 17:38:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13862616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bumble_Rumble/pseuds/Bumble_Rumble
Summary: Today, 4:45 p.mlord farquad has added oscar sharktale, i won't hesitate bitch, on all levels except physical i am grumpy bear, roomba to a new chatlord farquad: hewwo naughty children





	Sometimes Lifes Pretty Boring and Cheesy

**Author's Note:**

> group chat fic with shitty memes???
> 
> ask if you want something to be tagged <3

**Today, 4:45 p.m**

lord farquad has added oscar sharktale, i won't hesitate bitch, on all levels except physical i am grumpy bear, roomba to a new chat

lord farquad has changed the group name “Livin La Vida Loca (the version in shrek)

lord farquad: hewwo naughty children 

on all levels except physical i am grumpy bear: fuck off

roomba: jared why

oscar sharktale: Connor why is your username so long 

on all levels except physical i am grumpy bear: because i do what i want 

i won't hesitate bitch: Jared, why am I included in this chat?

lord farquad: ew grammar 

roomba: I dont know who sany onew iss

lord farquad: hi my names katrina 

on all levels except physical i am grumpy bear: stfu kleinman 

oscar sharktale: and my name is Hugh

oscar sharktale: jk it's zoe  
i assume roomba is Evan and I won't hesitate bitch is alana?

on all levels except physical i am grumpy bear: wow you didn't even mention me,  
your own flesh and blood

lord farquad: shut up connor

oscar sharktale: shut up connor 

i won't hesitate bitch: never shut up connor 

roomba: I seccind that!

on all levels expect physical i am grumpy bear: zoe what the fuck is with your username 

oscar sharktale: im oscar sharktale  
why is your username so long?

on all levels expect physical i am grumpy bear has changed their username

grumpy bear: are you happy now?

oscar sharktale: very much so

i won't hesitate bitch: Is there an explanation behind Evans username?

lord farquad: thats the username your confused about.

roomba: i relatw to roombas  
they are smwll and noisy

lord farquad: we should get matching usernames

grumpy bear: why???

lord farquad: no one asked for your opinion murphy  
besides  
it'll be funt 

oscar sharktale: funt 

grumpy bear: funt

i won't hesitate bitch: funt.

roomba: funt

lord farquad: this is bullying and slander  
we never make fun of evans typos!

grumpy bear: evan has shaky hands and also i hate you

i won't hesitate bitch: I quite like Jared's idea!  
Do you have a theme in mind?

roomba: oh no

lord farquad: S H R E K

oscar sharktale: why 

lord farquad: because 

i won't hesitate bitch has changed their username 

Puss in Boots: Livin la vida loca

oscar sharktale: ALANA NO  
YOU HAVE CORRUPTED MY DARLING

lord farquad: ooo evan can be fiona and connor can be shrek 

grumpy bear: why am i shrek 

Puss in Boots: Because people judge you before they know you!

oscar sharktale: because your ugly

roomba: im not cool wnough to be fiona

grumpy bear: yes you are!  
(your prettier than fiona too)

roomba: connor!

grumpy bear: evan!

lord farquad: this chat has overrun by home of sexuals 

oscar sharktale has changed their username 

donkey: connor change your name

grumpy bear: no. bitch

donkey: you made me do this

lord farquad: oh look what you made me do look what you made me do

roomba: zoe pleaser don't hurtt him

grumpy bear: i hear her footstepfj28w9ndbw

grumpy bear has changed their username

shrek: hI I'm Connor I feed my cat onions and steal my sisters nail polishkwpqL  
she stole my phone

lord farquad: im so glad i don't have siblings

roomba: you have 3 sisters

lord farquad: do i?

roomba has changed their username 

princess fiona: baby_grinch.jpg

donkey: that looks like connor. 

shrek has left the chat

lord farquad added shrek to the chat 

lord farquad: no escapo 

**Today, 9:12 p.m**

lord farquad: heeey  
this chat could be a lot worse 

shrek: how so?

lord farquad has added petal_patel, daddy, and kermitfucker516 to the chat

donkey: who the fuck are you?

kermitfucker516: Who the fuck are you?

donkey: I asked you first 

kermitfucker516: I asked you second

daddy: why do y'all have matching usernames.

shrek: i don't think you have the right to judge, daddy

daddy: wanna be my babyboy?

lord farquad: DJJRJEOQOQLDBHFFJLELAJEKSJJDJ  
I'M DYING SCOOB

roomba: JARED!

petal_patel: please let me out ;(

Puss in Boots: I know that kermitfucker516 is Dana P and petal_patel is Sabrina from English but who is ‘daddy’

daddy: your mom

lord farquad: its matt holtzer, my main hoe

shrek: Kleinman I would be so content with life if you never spoke again

lord farquad: >:3c

petal_patel: ew, jared is in this chat

lord farquad: hey

roomba: Heyy!

shrek: only i say ew in response to jareds existence

Puss in Boots: Don't be rude Sabrina  
I know your mother's number and I am sure she would not like to hear about her daughter cotton-candy vaping behind the girls locker room.

donkey: jesus, babe.

petal_patel: bitch

lord farquad has kicked petal_patel from the chat

shrek: the_evil_has_been_defeated.png

daddy: jared, sugar, why do all of you have shrek usernames?

lord farquad: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

daddy: well im leaving. goodbye my fair hoe

kermitfucker516: as am i, farewell people i dont know <3

daddy has left the chat

kermitfucker516 has left the chat

shrek: yo, if sabrina actually hurt your feeling jared, then i can do something to her

lord farquad: like what

shrek: i’ll beat her up and leave her body in the 3rd floor bathroom

donkey: i know her locker combination 

Puss in Boots: NO!!!

roomba: connor please do not

shrek: why shouldn’t i?

roomba: i’ll give youq a kiss

shrek: fine i wont

lord farquad: the murphy sibs are scary. Like the velociraptors in jurassic park

Puss in Boots: Zoe is not a velociraptor. You need to stop judging theme.

lord farquad: THEME. THE MIGHTY ALANA HAS MADE A TYPO

roomba: you dont know them 

lord farquad: IVE ALSO NEVER BEEN IN THEIR PANTS. OOOOOOOOO

**Today, 11:37 p.m**

lord farquad: lonely, im mr lonely, i have nobody for my owwwn

roomba: go to sleep jarwed, its a scgool night

Puss in Boots: Goodnight everyone!

donkey: sweet dreams 

lord farquad: night fuckos

princess fiona: dont let the bedbugs bite

shrek: goodnight everyone, i’ll remember you all in therapy 

**Today, 3:15 a.m**

shrek: still gonna beat up patel tho


End file.
